Sanctifying Habits: What is God Asking of Me Today?
This week I’m in the throes of getting back into my old routine. I’d love to blame it all on the Christmas break, but since it’s almost the end of January already, I don’t even have that excuse to fall back on.
Habits and routines are such strange things. It feels like dragging a screaming toddler uphill in the snow when I’m establishing them, and then as easy as that same toddler falling asleep in her carseat the minute she’s strapped in to break them. Seriously. I can work for months and months and solidify a productive routine, and the moment that something throws me off, it’s like I’m starting from scratch again.
The crazy thing is that this is true even if I plan my break and take time for a valid reason. Over the month of December, I knew that my family obligations would skyrocket. So I intentionally gave myself a pass, and refused any guilt about it. Because of that, I had a wonderful Christmas with my family, and my mind received its earned and needed rest.
I wonder, then, why it’s so hard for me to get back into my productive groove. I know this January weather isn’t helping, nor the fact that my kids have had four snow days (plus a MLK holiday) since going back to school. Weather and kids notwithstanding, my heart hasn’t felt inspired to write.
When I allowed myself some honest silence with Jesus about this, I realized I’m struggling with feelings of inadequacy. I see what other people are doing, I watch their reels on social media, and I feel like I’m falling short. I read the lives of the saints, and their virtue seems unattainable. I can’t possibly be as amazing as Joan or Faustina or Thérèse.
In his mercy, God spoke to me in the silence. He told me that he doesn’t want me to be like Joan or Faustina or Thérèse, because I’m not them. I’m Maria. And he has a special, completely unique mission for me. I can’t possibly be like any of the great saints, but it doesn’t mean I can’t be a great saint in my very own way.
Theodore Roosevelt wisely said, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” I can’t count the number of times I’ve shared a version of this quote with my kids. It comes out of my mouth in ways like, “Be grateful for what you have;” “If all you think about is what you’re missing out on, you’ll be miserable;” or “Look at what you do have! Focus on that!” Not surprisingly, I don’t have the eloquence of Theodore Roosevelt, but the sentiment is the same.
If only I had the ability to take my own good advice. I can be astonishingly wise when it comes to parenting and remain quite dense when it comes to myself. Learning about the great saints of our faith is a joy. Having powerful intercessors in heaven whom I can call on during my difficult times is an unmatched blessing. Feeling inspired by their willingness to give everything to Christ is, well, inspiring.
Thinking I’m failing in my vocation because my life doesn’t look like theirs? Now that is worthless. A complete waste of time and energy. I heard a priceless gem while listening to The Endow Podcast this week:
God doesn’t recycle.
God is constantly creating anew. Every single snowflake (you know, the ones that don’t seem to be stopping this year), is its own unique creation. No two flowers are identical. And no one else in the entire history (or future) of the world has the same soul, experiences, thoughts, ideas, disappointments, relationships, circumstances, creativity, frustrations, or wonder as me. I’m the one and only me.
God loves me so much he not only created me, but he then continues to give me experiences for my own sanctification. God deeply desires for me to become a great saint, and he knows exactly who I am, what I’m capable of, and what my circumstances are. He calls me today, from right where I am.
So today I am composing an imperfect blog post and getting myself back on track. What is God asking of you today?
Copyright 2023 Maria Riley
Image: Canva
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